Authenticity and honesty are characteristics that are difficult to find in a world where appearances reign.. Showing ourselves as we are is often not only not recognized as a good thing, but it can lead to negative consequences.
Honesty has become something so exotic that when it is detected, it is either rejected or we exalt it, transforming it into a fetish, a curiosity that generates interest in us but that we never consider completely natural.
However, and Despite all this, there are still people who, in their daily lives, live through authenticity. Sometimes it is difficult to detect them, because honesty can also be feigned and calculated as a personal marketing strategy.
Fortunately, if we develop a certain sensitivity to see beyond appearances, authentic people appear before our eyes… even where we did not expect to find them.
The 10 traits and attitudes of authentic people
To know how to differentiate authentic people from those who live for and for their public image, It is necessary that we pay attention to the traces of their personality that can be sensed behind their actions, their way of speaking and the content of what they say..
Although there is no single way to appreciate the diversity of opinions and personalities that authentic people display, here I propose 10 basic traits to intuit when we are having a conversation with someone who shows themselves as they are.
The main characteristics of authentic people are these.
1. They do not hide their nervousness
You might think that someone who is nervous is hiding something, but in reality that is not the case. All people, regardless of whether they are more or less shy or more or less extroverted, can become very nervous in seemingly uncomplex social situations.
Authentic people do not consider voice tremors and moments of doubt about what to say to be a weakness.and consequently they will not regret having shown themselves that way nor will they try to hide their state of anxiety with any excuse that serves to interrupt communication.
Even if they are having a bad time, they will try to express themselves as frankly as possible, and will even refer to their own state of nervousness without any qualms.
2. They are not afraid to show their opinions
Authentic people give their opinion without filters when they believe it may be of interest in a certain context.
They will not force their own views to fit the general consensusamong other things because if everyone did the same this «unanimous and collective opinion» would be totally blurred.
3. They do not hide their sadness
We have become such competitive people that we have embraced the idea of giving a false image of our personality to find a place in society.. That makes, for example, even relatively normal to fake happiness to generate more acceptance.
Authentic people reject the mandate to always be content and happy, regardless of circumstances, because they live by a philosophy in which even pain and frustration are natural emotions and must be accepted.
4. They are not ashamed to spontaneously offer compliments
Authentic people spontaneously offer complimentseven in situations where they are not expected. This implies that they do not worry about whether this generates suspicion in the other person, who could come to think that they are trying to gain their favor to achieve some objective.
On the other hand, people who offer compliments out of personal interests usually give them in contexts in which they are socially part of conventions and are not unexpected, such as when trying a dish made by another person.
5. They express anger directly
Authentic people make it clear when they are disappointed or angry about something.instead of resorting to certain strategies to «get revenge» on the other, such as stopping talking to them without giving explanations about what has made them feel bad.
In other words, they are not passive-aggressive in the face of conflicts, but act consistently and show their rejection of things they consider unfair.
6. They express their beliefs without trying to rationalize them
When an authentic person does something moved by faith, hope or simple intuitions, they explain their reasons transparently.. This means that he gives up the possibility of camouflaging his ignorance about what is going to happen by resorting to apparently rational arguments to make it seem that his criteria deserve greater authority.
Somehow, people who show themselves as they are accept that many facets of our lives are covered by uncertainty, and that hunches are as necessary as knowledge based on proven facts.
7. They do not judge others
Honesty also consists of not judging the behavior of others through a rigid moral scheme.because they assume that each person’s personality is flexible and changing enough to go beyond social conventions.
That is, they do not try to criticize others, directly or indirectly, for strange or strident behavior, because that would be like placing themselves on a moral step above others without deserving it.
8. They recognize the weaknesses of others and accept them
Authentic people do not have to believe that certain personal vulnerabilities of others are good in and of themselves.but they accept them and do not laugh at them. Doing so would imply implying that they themselves have not been in a similar situation.
9. They are curious and ask when they want to know
Authenticity is also reflected in the way in which one’s own ignorance is shown to others.. Honest people ask about the meaning of certain words even though they sense that everyone else knows it well, and the same goes for all kinds of knowledge gaps that they may notice in their mind.
10. They ask for help when necessary
Authentic people do not shy away from situations in which they must cooperate or ask for help.. Although not all of them have to enjoy the company of others, they do not hesitate to seek support in their social circles, and they do so without trying to pass off this situation as a mutual favor to protect their ego.