“A woman flirts with my boyfriend, what do I do?”. Regardless of the type of relationship and trust you have with your partner, these types of situations arise and generate discomfort, especially if the couple has not previously spoken.
You can feel like the most secure woman in the world and fully trust your partner, but having another woman flirt with your boyfriend is unpleasant to say the least, because it feeds this construct that most of us have been raised with, that women are competition among ourselves.
The idea of solidarity between women, or sisterhood, is quite romantic, but much more socially and emotionally responsible. Now, there are shameless women, too, it is a reality.
Andrés Vernazza, coach and researcher in human and couple relationships, known in TikTok under the username of @emprendedormoderno in a community of more than 5 million followers and who accumulates more than 171.8 million likes on the platform, gave two pieces of advice regarding what you should do when another person blatantly flirts with your partner.
The influencer reacted to a scene from the series How I met your mother (How I Met Your Mother) in which the protagonist Barney Stinson is on a date at a restaurant with Robin Scherbatsky and a waitress with a plunging neckline leans over the man. He doesn’t even know her and leans in to make eye contact with her date, as if to say “this is insignificant.”
- Don’t complain, set limits: Each member of the couple must communicate what they feel comfortable with and what they are not comfortable with, what fidelity and loyalty are for each one, and based on that, make decisions that create relational capital.
“It’s not your job to teach your partner how to respect you. Your job is to set boundaries and see if your partner follows them,” she stated.
- Do not mark territory, but observe: Even if it causes you to grab the whore who flirts with your boyfriend by the hair, it’s not your job. He alone should be able to get rid of her, if he doesn’t, maybe it’s time to rethink that relationship.
“In the event that another person gives your partner the cold shoulder, your job is not to mark territory, it is not to intervene, it is not to fight with that person who comes to flirt. No. Your job is to see if your partner respects your limits, if your partner gives you your place,” she explained.
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