Fairy tales, romantic movies and soap operas are full of love stories that make women sigh, especially for women. Traditionally, the theory has been instilled in you that there is a person tailored to you.that is, the love of your life.
But that perception could cause love to be idealized to the point of distorting what is really needed in a romantic relationship: maturity, emotional work, peace, loyalty and stability. Something that princes charming does not offer.
Love is a decision, and for this reason, Building and cultivating it is our responsibility, not destiny’s.. It is our task to correctly choose the person we consider ideal to share our lives with and it is vital that we are clear about this.
Will I ever find the love of my life?
The Venezuelan psychotherapist, Carlos Fraga, assures that “if the love of life exists, why not? Of course it exists, But what I don’t believe is that it’s just one person.».
Sometimes people tend to think that there is a person, somewhere in the world, with an invisible thread that connects them and one day they will meet. But it also happens that “the love of your life” is that classmate that you have never been able to forget. So?
You also come to believe that it is the person who left you, but that you loved like no one else, or it can only be the one with whom you have incredible chemistry, even though it is never formalized. According to Carlos Fraga, the love of your life is not an exclusive person, “It is a mistake to live thinking about the past and get stuck in it”.
The better half, the soul mate and the love of life are part of the same ideologies. Photo: Freepik
The love you want vs the love you need
“I firmly believe at this point in life that You will never have the love with whom you dream, but with who you need. And in that, life is absolutely wise,” she pointed out in her program “Life is Today.”
It is common that by thinking about that “dream love” you can belittle an “ordinary” person with whom you can build the love that you both truly need.
The specialist assures that “The love you need is the one that will mature you, to allow a platform on which you can grow.”. It is the love that will really make you work on something, which one believes is for the other person, but in reality you work for yourself, for both of you.”
In fact, there are people who have a romantic relationship with someone and still believe that the love of their life is in the past. “Whoever you have next to you is the being you need,” Fraga insists.
“It is the person with whom you decided to be and with whom you work on love. It is very important that you know that this is the love of your life… the being you have today”.
Finally he added that “each stage of life has different ways of loving, but what is key is not to anchor ourselves with loves from life in the past, because it seems that the rest, the current, is like waste.”.
Thinking this way is a disdain for yourself and for the person you are with, who may make you feel special.